My arms were trembling and I could barely hold myself up.

Sweat was dripping down my face and it was getting harder to breathe.

I felt like the intensity of the movements were too much for me.

I thought to myself – there’s no way I can do this.

And then I heard my boys cheering me on and clapping for me to keep going.

I took a deep breath in.

I finished the last five minutes of my workout using every last ounce of energy inside of me.

I collapsed on the floor in pure exhaustion.

I rolled over and I say “oh shit that was hard”

I know, not the best choice of words in front of my nine year old twin boys – but, I’m human.

I quickly apologized for swearing and Bubba nodded his head “yes” and walked over to me.

I was expecting a little slap on my arm or a firm finger pointing “no” because he recognized I said a bad word.

Instead, he took my hand and without saying a word, wrapped his small pinky finger around mine to do “pinky promise.”

This is something that we do frequently with his twin brother and Ethan is always watching.

I looked at him and said “pinky promise” and he shook his head yes.

I pinky promised that I would try not to swear again like that in front of him.

He was smiling from ear to ear.

He knew I understood what he was asking of me.

He approached me and used a hand gesture to tell me that he didn’t like that .

He was asking me to reassure him that I wouldn’t do it again.

He communicated.

That is a HUGE accomplishment.

Communication does not have to be verbal words.

And Ethan proves that to us every single day.

A simple pinky promise left me in tears and feeling so incredibly proud that he found a way to express how he was feeling in that moment.

A pinky promise that I will try my hardest not to break.

Bubba ~ Mommy is not perfect.
I make mistakes and I am continually learning.

But I pinky promise to do better and try harder tomorrow.

I pinky promise to use kinder words when I’m feeling exhausted or overwhelmed.

I pinky promise to take a deep breath when I’m feeling anxious or worried.

I pinky promise to be the best mom I can be for you, your brother and your sister.

Life is tough Bubba, but so are we.

And I pinky promise to be here loving you through it each and every day.